The drive to Basundhara was longer than before and I spent it thinking about Tarini and what she was about to experience. We were going to be taking her from all she has known for two years. I can’t even begin to imagine what it would feel like to be removed from my home and sent with people I didn’t know, who smell so strange and eat things and go places I never imagined. Not to mention the fact that they do not speak my native language and I only knew a few words of theirs. As I contemplated all of these things, I reminded myself that we needed to be sensitive to her needs and respect what she would be going through.
The gate to Basundhara is down a very narrow and curvy alley with people, cows, dogs and goats everywhere. Your mind is so focused on the people, and the swerving of the driver to avoid them, that the gate is all of a sudden upon you and you don’t quite remember how you got there. As we are ushered out of our car by our gracious and kind driver, I am overcome with the enormity of what the day’s events will bring. Our driver carries Benjamin through the gates as we gather the donations we have brought for the children’s home. We walk through the gates and hear the sounds of children coming from many directions. There are people in front of us and all of a sudden Tarini runs through them, looking directly in my eyes all the way and jumps into my arms. I cannot begin to tell you what an amazing feeling it is to have a little child, who had only met me the day before, run to me with such joy and purpose. God has surely orchestrated this little girl becoming part of our family and we continue to see evidence of this as each day passes.
Tarini is all legs and arms and she is wrapped around me like we have been mother and child for so much longer than the 24 hours since we have met. She loosens her grip and grabs my hand and we walk to the office to deliver our suitcases of donations. We are told that the gentleman necessary to finish our paperwork must leave for court and we are to wait in a family room. We are taken to the family room and get settled in. We are invited to eat lunch later in the day and while we wait we are greeted by many visitors. Different children stream in and out throughout the day and Tarini eagerly shows each new child her things as if for the first time. Older girls come and talk with us and we are treated when they ask if they can paint our nails. They ask what color we want and hurry off to retrieve it. When they return, all of our toes and fingernails are painted a brilliant shade of orange and our feet are adorned with traditional designs.
We enjoy a lovely visit with the nurse who works with the babies and children. She tells us of growing up at Basundhara and how her friends all went away to other countries through adoption. She receives letters and the occasional visit from them and it is so heartwarming to listen to her tell of the joy she feels when she hears from them.
Not long after the young lady leaves, lunch is served by three young ladies and Tarini’s house mother. The smells were amazing as they brought in tray after tray of delicious Indian dishes. Far more food than all of us could eat and we were disappointed that they would not eat with us. We were told that we were the guests and would be served. Coming from the Midwest and southeast, we are accustomed to casual dining and everyone eating together, family and friends. This was unfamiliar territory for us and we didn’t feel worthy of being served by these sweet young women who had worked for hours preparing the food. They did however stay and watch us eat, showing surprise when Benjamin didn’t want the bland food they insisted on preparing for him, but rather ate more spicy Indian food than Eric and I combined. We thanked our hosts for the lovely lunch, but thanks didn’t seem sufficient.
We waited for several hours and so our confinement to the family room did not last long with a 3 year old and a five year old. Benjamin convinced Grandma to take him to play with some ride-on toys and Tarini ushered me all over the complex. We greeted and chatted with so many people that day; I wish I could remember them all. Everyone was so warm and eager to talk to us and we felt so very welcomed by all.
It was approaching evening and we needed to head back to our hotel before dark. Eric decided to check on the ETA of Akshaya so that we could complete our paperwork. We were in luck; he was just arriving back from court. We had some small business to take care of, documents to sign and things to go over. Tarini said her goodbyes to Akshaya and we began the long process of leaving Basundhara.
During our goodbyes, one of the women told me that Tarini’s house mother wanted to paint my feet. As I sat down and watched her prepare the dye, I felt like I was watching from outside my body. It didn’t seem real, that in that very moment, we were in the final minutes of our time at Basundhara and we would soon leave with our long awaited daughter. As Nirmala dipped her fingers in the dye and gently painted my feet; I felt such love and thanks toward a woman I had just met. She raised my daughter for the last two years and what an amazing job she has done. I have so much to be thankful for in my life and Nirmala is yet another blessing that I thank God for every day. Tarini was so well prepared emotionally for what was to come and I know Nirmala played a major role in that.
We had Tarini say goodbye to her friends and then to her housemother Nirmala. She seemed very anxious to leave, but we wanted to be respectful of the people who have been her family for two years. As a five year old, she couldn’t possibly understand the enormity of what walking through the gates would mean. But she impressed all of us throughout the whole process of leaving. We were prepared for her to pull away from us or show signs of wanting to stay, but she was the one pulling me to the gates as I cried for her house mother and all she was watching walk away. Nirmala watched us as we made our way to the gate. Which in and of itself was not an easy task as we were surrounded by dozens and dozens of women and children. Nirmala is very shy but you could see the sadness in her eyes as she watched us go. I lost eye contact with her for a bit as we made our way through the crowd but she was soon by the car looking into my eyes. So much was said as her eyes stayed with mine. I was being charged with a very high task and Tarini is so blessed to have had Nirmala in her life.
As the car pulled away from Basundhara, Tarini never looked back. I kept expecting her to turn around and watch the women and children fade into the background but it never happened. This little girl was so ready to begin the next chapter of her life and we are blessed beyond measure that we are a part of that.
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